Isolated!
by ivy-chan
Summary: What will happen when the Inuyasha gang is stuck in a closet? ... And how did Kagome get that squirt bottle? (rated pg-13 just to be safe ^_^)


Isolated!

[A/N:  I'd like to thank my friend, Sean, for helping me write a part in the fanfic when I had serious writers block..  ^_^  Also, I don't own Inuyasha.]

Inuyasha:  [Waking up from sleep] ….  Hey!!!!  [Reaches to the back of his neck and pulls out a dart]  WHAT THE HE---

Ivy:  Hey, Inuyasha!  Welcome to my new fanfic…  Isolated!!

[Kagome, Sango, Miroku, Shippo, and Sesshomaru awaken]

Inuyasha:  You have the stench of a human…  [Grabs the sheath of the Tetsusaiga]  LET'S END IT ALL NOW!!!!

Ivy:  Not so fast…  I've already taken care of your sword and hidden it in a safe place while you slept from that sleeping dart…  I can't take any chances of getting blood all over my dad's closet!

Sango:  Why would you kidnap us, anyway…?

Ivy:  Well, I just think you guys are so awesome that I wanted to meet you in person and post you on my website!

Inuyasha:  [Cracks his claws] You will die…

Kagome:  [Blushes]  Wait, Inuyasha!  She makes a good point…

Inuyasha:  DON'T FALL FOR HER FLATTERY!!!

Kagome:  [Eyes narrow]  Sit, boy.

[Inuyasha's necklace glows and he falls through the floor.]

Ivy:  [Sigh]  I was afraid this would happen…  Kagome, I really can't have you guys ruining Dad's closet!  If you need to punish the dog-demon, use this…  [Hands Kagome a spray bottle]

Inuyasha:  WHAT DID YOU CALL ME!??!

Kagome:  Wow!  Thanks!

Ivy:  Why don't you try it out…

[Kagome sprays some water on Inuyasha.  In response, he hisses and curls up into a ball.]

Kagome:  Wow, that's great…  But why hasn't anyone else been talking?  Shippo?  Sango?  Miroku?

Sesshomaru:  Ah yes.  I have cleverly hidden those idiots while you were rambling on…  Now, give me the Tetsusaiga or you'll never see them again!!!

Ivy:  [Another sigh]  Honestly, Sesshomaru.  I was expecting more out of you…  This is a closet and there's no place to hide them!  [Directs everyone's attention to a corner where Miroku, Sango, and Shippo are all tied up]

Sesshomaru:  [Sweat bead]  …  Ah heh heh…  Say, Ivy, How would you like to team up with me?  You fetch me the Tetsusaiga and I'll grant you whatever wish you desire…?

Ivy:  No.  Anyway, I would prefer that you didn't make ransoms or tie people up…  You know, so this would be more enjoyable … (and so Dad's closet wouldn't get all messed up)

[Inuyasha unties Miroku and Sango, ignoring what Ivy says…]

Shippo:  HEY!  WHAT ABOUT ME?!  UNTIE ME, INUYASHA!!

Inuyasha:  Feh!  You don't do us any good in battle, anyway!  We only had you along out of sympathy for your dead father!!!!!!  You're old enough…  Go find some other people to bother!!!!!

Shippo:  [Tearing up]  KAGOME WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU!!!!  YOU'RE NOTHING BUT A COLD, HEARTLESS BASTAR-

Inuyasha:  NANI!?  KAGOME SAID _WHAT_?!

Kagome:  Eh heh heh…  It wasn't like _that, Shippo…._

Ivy:  ENOUGH!!!!!!  STOP FIGHTING OR I'LL TAKE YOU ALL OUT WITH THE TETSUSAIGA!!!!

Sesshomaru:  Oh, good!  Use the Tetsusaiga, Ivy!

Ivy:  [Rolls her eyes in disgust]  I originally planned this to be a discussion…  I wanted to talk to you all and see the roots that have caused all this tension between you guys!!

Shippo:  The "roots" that have caused our fighting is….  INUYASHA!!!

Inuyasha:  I'LL KILL YOU, YOU LITTLE….

Ivy:  That's a great start!  Now, I think I'd like to have my first interview with Miroku.  He's been quiet throughout this whole thing.

Miroku:  Yes, I _have_ been pretty quiet, haven't I…  [Big smile]

Ivy:  Yeeeeeah…  Okay, first I'd like to ask you…  If you could change anything about the group, what would it be?

Miroku:  Oh, that's an easy question, Ivy!  I'd add more beautiful women!  You see, I'm on a quest to find the perfect lady to bear my child… and those two over there haven't been any help at all!!!

[Kagome and Sango slap Miroku and he collapses.]

Ivy:  Uh… you guys… please don't get violent!  How many times do I have to tell you?!  Okay, I'm going to interview Sango now… before Miroku returns to consciousness…

Inuyasha:  That pervert…

Ivy:  What's that?

Inuyasha:  Nothing…

Ivy:  Okay, Sango…  Who causes the most anger in th—

Sango:  Inuyasha.

Inuyasha:  Why, I'll break that stupid boomerang of yours so badly…

Ivy:  Kagome?

Kagome:  I know…  [Puts the mist bottle in jet spray mode and squirts Inuyasha]

Inuyasha:  AHHHH!!!!!  THE PAIN!!!!!  [Rolls around on the carpet and tears fall out of his eyes]

Kagome:  Inuyasha, are you crying….?

Inuyasha:  No!  [Turns away quickly and sobs]

Kagome:  I'm so sorry!!!

Sango:  You poor thing!!!

[Soon, everyone, including Sesshomaru, gives Inuyasha a group hug.]

Inuyasha:  STOP IT!  STOP IT RIGHT NO-O-OW!!!!!!

Shippo:  Not until you stop crying, you baby!!

[Inuyasha's eyes turn red and soon, everyone runs away from him.]

Shippo:  [Crying]  DADDY!!!!!!

Inuyasha:  [Becomes normal again]  Don't touch me.

Ivy:  Wow…  Inuyasha.  You really should control that anger!  You ought to go on a date with Kagome or something.  Maybe ithat/i would calm you down a bit.

Sango:  You really shouldn't antagonize him like that…

Inuyasha:  YOU WANT ME TO WHA…..!?!?

Kagome:  [Turns away and blushes]

Shippo:  Inuyasha!  Just ask her out; you know you want to!!!

[Ivy's friend, Sean, bursts through the closet door.]

Ivy:  Sean, get outta here!!!  I'm interviewing Inuyasha characters!!!!!

Sean:  I would've asked before coming, but… you know… that's so out of fashion these days…..

Sesshomaru:  [Grins] Sean… such a nice name…  Why don't you come here and help me out…

Sean:  Okay… [Walks over]

Sesshomaru: [Grabs Sean by the arm] HA!  Hand over the Tetsusaiga, idiot girl, or never see this boy again!

Ivy:  […I should have left the door locked from the outside too….] ….  Uh…  Fine, kill Sean.  But then, I'd kill you with the Tetsusaiga and steal your Tensaiga to bring him back.

Sean:  Ha ha ha…….  Ivy, I'm gonna ride home now, ok?

Ivy:  Can't.  The door's locked from the inside…

[Inuyasha and Shippo scratch at the door.]

Ivy:  I also put some spell scrolls on the door to lock youkai in….

Inuyasha:  NANI!?  YOU'RE MORE SCHEMING THAN NARAKU!!!!

Sango:  Ivy, you're being unfair!  We have lives outside this…. closet… it's wrong of you to lock us up for some stupid conversation.

Sean:  [Still in the clutches of Sesshomaru]  Gasp!

Ivy:  I just have a few more things to ask.

[Miroku wakes up]

Inuyasha:  Miroku… Baka…

Sean: [Gasping for air] I..hhhhe....huuuuh.......vy

Ivy: Sean, please hold on. I need to finish asking questions.

Kagome: Your friend is choking, and you're doing nothing about it?

Miroku: yeah!

Sango: Just because you're taking our side doesn't mean you're not a pervert!

Miroku: ....................................

Shippo: That guy....... person!

Sean: [Collapses on the floor]

Inuyasha: YOU KILLED HIM!

Sesshomaru: So...................?

Inuyasha: That's the nicest thing you've ever done............

Ivy: [Looks up and begins taking notes]

Sango, Shippo, Kagome, Miroku: [All at once] YOUR FRIEND!

Ivy: He's fine

[Group looks stunned]

[Inuyasha and Sesshomaru hug]

[Once again group look stunned]

Sean: HAO!

Group: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Ivy: [Still taking notes]

Sean: [Stands up, hands on hips] How was I?

Group: ..............

Ivy: Oh, Sean's an actor

Shippo:  Actor my butt!!!  He doesn't even dress accordingly!!

Miroku:  Yes, I have seen better.  Sean, you do kabuki dramas, right?

Sean:  Yes, but it's a long story….

Inuyasha to Sesshomaru: I love you, man.

Sesshomaru:  Same here, I'm sorry about the time I almost killed you, and that time when I had an affair with Kikyo…..

Inuyasha:  NANI!?!?  BASTA—

Kagome:  [Furious]   Inuyasha….

Inuyasha:  Not now, Kagome!!!  I have a brother to kill….

[Kagome sprays the squirt bottle]

Inuyasha:  OWWWWWW!!!!  [Censored]  WHAT DID I DO NOW?!!

[Kagome storms out of the closet, despite the many locks and prayer scrolls on it]

Sango:  YOU'RE SO CLUELESS, INUYASHA!!!

Miroku:  That's no way to treat a lady!

Ivy:  [Looks up from her notes]   Mmmmhmm…  Inuyasha, you and Kagome seem to be having major communication problems…  Would you ever consider couple therapy? 

Inuyasha:  [Ears perk up]   What's that?

Ivy:  It's when... when two people have problems…. They go see a "special doctor" to help them resolve all their issues.  Although the cost is quite hefty, you will see—

Inuyasha:  Sounds like fun!  I want to see this "special doctor!"  Say, can they even fix the problems I've been having with my brother?

Ivy:  Some can…

Shippo:  Wait, whatever happened when you said you had "just a few more questions to ask!?!"  

Ivy:  [Ahem] Well, we've run out of time!  I guess you guys will have to stay in here until I write the sequel to this! -- Which may be a while…  Thanks for reading!!

Miroku:  What happened to Kagome anyway…?


End file.
